


In the dead of night

by Khim_Azaghal



Series: Bristol [5]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Anger, Angst, Apologies, Cuffs, Foreplay, Light BDSM, M/M, Makeup Sex, Mention of blood, Panic, Perineal massage, Rimming, Sensory Deprivation, a wet dream gone wrong, blindfold, foot injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2018-10-15 02:30:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10548530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khim_Azaghal/pseuds/Khim_Azaghal
Summary: This is my contribution to Gathering FiKi's Kink Bingo ;)Please heed the tags![unbetaed]





	1. Chapter 1

**Bristol, November of 2008.**

_“Yeah… Arch your back for me, baby. So beautiful… “_

_Kili gulped hard and did what he was told as the large leather straps of the flogger caressed his skin. He could feel Fili’s look on his naked body, drinking him in with a growing hunger._

_Indeed, the Irishman was a sight to behold._

_Kili was kneeling on dark and thick furs in front of a stone fireplace, his hands cuffed behind his back. His head was comfortably set on a pillow. Fili had gathered his long curls in a loose bun and had covered his eyes with a black satin blindfold._

_All Kili could sense was the crackling of the burning wood and the soft sound of Fili’s naked feet on the stone floor as the latter was calmly walking around him. The sharp sound of the camera’s shutter made Kili’s hairs stand on ends._

_Fili’s solid presence around him, weighing on him, helped Kili to stay still. His shoulders felt stiff, and his arms were hurting, but his focus was on Fili. Only Fili and his desire for him._

_A faint smell of sandalwood and leather came to the Irishman’s nostrils. His lover was standing in front of him, and Kili tried to concentrate on his calm and steady breathing. A subtle rustle of fabric and the sandalwood smell grew stronger. Kili’s pulse stuttered and quickened when he felt the heat of Fili’s breath on his face._

_Soft lips met the skin of Kili’s cheekbone, eliciting a shiver and a sigh. The Irishman felt his lover’s mouth trailing across his face while a gentle hand petted his hair._

_“You’re so obedient, my love,” purred Fili. “You deserve a reward.”_

_Kili gritted his teeth when he felt Fili smirking against his cheek._

_“Permission to speak,” whispered the blonde. “I want to hear you. Tell me what you want.”_

_“I… ” Kili had to clear his throat for he hadn’t used his voice in a long time. “I need your touch. Your hands. Please.”_

_Kili felt Fili’s smirk growing feral as the latter heard his hoarse plea. The soft tip of a tongue licked his mouth, and Kili instinctively parted his lips, his tongue darting out to meet Fili’s. But the blond had other plans in mind, so he got up, making Kili groan in frustration._

_One moment later, only the smell of leather still lingered. Fili had left the flogger on the floor._

_At first, Kili didn’t register the touch of Fili’s fingertips on his shoulders. His hands had been cuffed behind his back for so long the Irishman almost couldn’t feel touch anymore. Fili pressed a bit harder, and Kili grimaced as the pain woke in his tied up limbs._

_“Turn around. On your back,” Fili ordered. His voice was soft, but his firm tone sent an intense shiver of lust down the Irishman’s spine._

_Kili’s articulations screamed as he laid on his side to slide his cuffed wrists to his front, but no sound crossed his lips. It was the rule. He had agreed to it._

_“Good boy. Now breathe slowly and relax. You’ll get your reward in due time.”_

_Kili left Fili’s words sink in and let them form a soothing loop in his mind. The fire was still crackling in the hearth, and its heat licked pleasantly at Kili’s exposed flank._

_Despite Fili’s warning, the sole of Kili’s right foot tickled for a fraction of second before strong and slick fingers applied growing pressure on it with gentle yet firm strokes. The brunet allowed himself a silent sigh as waves of sensual bliss coursed through his body._

_Fili’s hands moved to his other foot after a few minutes, and the massage slowly continued its journey up to Kili’s calves and knees. The blond settled himself between his lover’s legs and slowly opened them wide._

_“Your body is so gorgeous… Your skin… so smooth… ”_

_Kili could feel his arousal awakening as Fili’s oiled hands slid up his thighs._

_“Oh, God,” exhaled Kili in a shaky breath. His voice was barely as loud as a whisper, but he felt like he had cried out loud._

_Fili chuckled lightly. His head was now pillowed on the inside of Kili’s right thigh, and he was trailing a finger along the other Irishman’s hardening cock._

_“Gorgeous, just gorgeous… ”_

_Kili barely heard his lover’s praise. Blood was rushing through his veins, and his fastening heartbeat was thrumming in his ears like thunder. His mouth opened on a silent gasp when he felt Fili nuzzle his groin and alternate between licking and sucking his balls._

_Desperate to stay quiet, Kili gritted his teeth and breathed deeply through his nose. His fingers clenched and curled until his knuckles turned white, his wrists still restrained by the cuffs. God, he needed to hold on to something to ground himself, so he threw his arms up over his head to grip the pillow with both hands._

_Kili’s erection was now heavy and throbbing against his belly, demanding attention. Fili ignored it and knelt between Kili’s thighs. With maddening slowness, he let his hands slide down his lover’s flanks, followed the V shape of his groin with light fingertips, and moved lower until his thumbs brushed the thick ridge of Kili’s perineum. Skilful fingers worked the tender flesh, making Kili sigh._

_Though Fili’s touch sent highly pleasurable waves through his body, Kili was seeking more contact, so he dug his heels into the furs and pressed against Fili’s hands._

_“Shhh, patience, my love,” purred Fili. “Don’t rush it.”_

_The gentle strokes intensified slowly and turned into firmer rubs going up and down but never touching Kili’s hole or cock. The Irishman had to battle against the frustrated whine building up in his throat. This was torture, and he felt as if he were going to burst._

_Just as he thought he couldn’t take it anymore, Kili felt Fili grab his thighs and lift them until he was almost folded in half, his knees nearly touching his shoulders. Before he had time to process what had just happened, the hot wetness of a tongue applied to his anus made Kili shudder violently. Fili settled his weight on Kili’s thighs and held onto them with an iron grip before devouring the pink pucker of flesh as if it were the most delicious treat._

_Kili was now completely trapped. And he loved it. Offering himself to Fili, trusting him with his body and soul, was another way of declaring his love to him._

_Struggling to refrain the moans naturally coming to life in his throat now required all his willpower. Kili wanted to scream, to beg Fili to fuck him, but could just open his mouth wide and gasp for breath like a drowning man. The darkness in front of his eyes only allowed him to feel, and God, it was the best high of his life._

_Fili was showing no clemency. Every flick of his tongue, every nip were meant to bring Kili higher and higher but not enough to come._

_Desperate to be brought to completion, Kili thrashed his head from side to side, sending his dark curls flying wildly. His head began to swim, and he wondered briefly if he was about to pass out from too much stimulation._

_The fire, the sweat drenched furs beneath him, Fili’s mouth, the dull ache in his shoulders, the blackness surrounding him… It felt too much all of a sudden. Kili had to remember their safe word. Now._

_“Dearg!”His scream came out strangled and ragged._

_Fili stopped immediately, and his voice sounded full of concern._

_“Kili?”_

 

“Kili? Wake up! You have a bad dream.”

 

The Irishman sat up with a gasp, blinking furiously and feeling on the verge of panic. A soothing hand brushed his shoulder, but the contact made him startle.

 

“Babe, are you all right? Speak to me, please!”

 

Now adapted to the semi-darkness of the room, Kili was able to recognise his surroundings. He was in his bed, tangled in a sweat-drenched sheet. Fili was beside him, and he looked shocked and worried.

 

Kili gulped hard and winced when he found his mouth and throat dry as cardboard. He needed water.

 

“Thirsty,” he managed to let out in a raspy voice.

 

“I’m fetching you some water!” Fili answered while jumping out of bed and rushing to the bathroom.

 

Kili ran both hands through his tangled curls. What the fuck was that? The Irishman shivered and felt all his skin tingle as he exhaled a shaky breath. Intensely vivid memories flashed through his mind: Fili blindfolding him, the restraints, the fire, the erotic sensations driving him almost mad with lust, and then… sheer panic.

 

The Irishman felt suddenly sick with shame. Where did that dream come from? Since the “thumb incident” two weeks earlier, Kili had felt out of the loop and had been plagued with weird sexual dreams leaving him panting in the dead of night. Truth be told, Fili and he never talked about what had happened and didn’t have sex since then.

 

Kili was still trying to figure things out when Fili came back with a pint of water and a towel.

 

“Here.” Fili handed the glass and waited for Kili to drink it before he draped his lover’s bare shoulders with the towel and gently pressed to dry the glistening skin.

 

“That was a nasty dream, yeah? I heard you moaning in your sleep, and it woke me up. I tried to understand what you were saying, but you were babbling,” Fili explained while dabbing Kili’s back. “It’s only when you shouted that I tried to wake you.”

 

“What was I saying?” Kili asked, worried that he might have divulged embarrassing things.

 

“I just couldn’t understand a word, except the last one. You screamed ‘dearg’ a couple of times before waking up. What happened?”

 

Concern was back in Fili’s eyes and Kili hated being the source of it.

 

“I don’t know if it’s the right time to talk about it. I’m sorry I woke you up.” Kili reached out and took Fili’s hand. “We’ll talk about it in the morning. I promise.”

 

Fili sighed. “All right.” Kili looked so relieved the blond couldn’t help himself smile. After a quick kiss, Fili patted Kili’s thigh and said: “Ok, now budge up. Take a shower and I change the bedding. I don’t want to sleep on a sweat patch, even if it’s yours.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli's bad dream is far from being over.

Lingering memories from his dream had kept Kíli awake for the rest of the night, and fragments of thoughts tormented him with guilt until the early hours of the day.

 

When morning came, the Irishman had managed to sleep only three hours and was feeling moody. He knew he had promised to talk with Fíli, but all he hoped right now was that his lover would have forgotten about it.

 

He feigned to be asleep when he felt Fíli pressing himself against his back and kiss his bare shoulder. Fíli’s lips were a bit dry from thirst, but their caress brought a pleasant warmth to Kíli’s skin.

 

The blond Irishman had the habit of sleeping naked, and Kíli had never complained about it so far. However, this morning felt different. Being spooned and feeling Fíli’s cock pressing lazily between his buttocks was too much to handle. Kíli had to repress a sigh and prevent himself from grinding against his lover’s erection. It certainly would pass if he played dead, and he mustered all his willpower to do so. Focusing on not moving and controlling his breath was more and more difficult as Fíli had apparently decided to be cuddly this morning.

 

Fortunately for Kíli, the torture stopped after a few minutes.

 

***~~~~***

 

The lack of response from his lover had surprised him at first, and soon Fíli had sensed something was odd about Kíli once again. Anxiety had begun to instil doubt in his mind, but Fíli had refused to let suspicion take over and had eventually convinced himself that Kíli needed to rest after such a bad night. Too bad. They could have had fun.

 

After a last peck on Kíli’s shoulder blade, the blonde Irishman had finally shifted on his side of the bed to stretch out before heading to the bathroom. Peeing while sporting a raging hard-on would prove to be a difficult challenge.

 

As he heard the shower going, Kíli buried his face into Fíli’s pillow and took a deep breath through his nose. The smell of sandalwood mixed with his lover’s scent grounded him.

He was madly in love, and the force of this feeling scared him to no end. He was no boyfriend material; he was convinced of it. Could he change? Could he be strong enough to support Fíli through his therapy? He didn’t want to make his lover suffer, but he had been cowardly playing his procrastination card day after day for two weeks now. He had to talk with Fíli; he knew it. How to do it smartly was another matter.

 

***~~~~***

 

One hour and a half had passed when Kíli opened his eyes for the second time with a slight headache. He felt sleepy and dull, a bit like when he was hungover. What a night…

 

The Irishman rubbed his eyes and groaned before kicking the comforter in which he was entangled. He needed to hit the bathroom but didn't want to get up. Just as he felt his bladder couldn't wait anymore, the smell of coffee convinced him to drag his miserable self out of the protective warmth of his bed.

 

A scalding shower seemed to be a good idea at first, but Kíli wanted to put his disastrous night behind him, so he turned the water’s temperature lower and lower until he gasped and shivered from the cold. After a silent count to three, the Irishman positioned the shower head higher and let the cold water flow on his face and hair for a long minute. When he felt sufficiently awake, he shook his head like a wet dog would, sending his curls and water flying everywhere.

 

There, he was eventually back to the world of the living. After putting on a pair of sweatpants and a tank top, Kíli went down the creaking stairs.

 

***~~~~***

 

Fíli was still fragile and was well aware of it. After months of hesitation and false excuses he had resumed his therapy and was digging into bad memories, reopening old wounds and reviving negative thoughts about himself. The last psychiatrist he had dealt with when he was in London had tried to persuade him that his homosexuality was the problem. That day, Fíli had fled the man’s office without a backwards glance.

 

Fortunately, he had a good feeling about his new therapist, who was a kind and benevolent woman he sensed he could trust. He had confided in her about his reluctance regarding anal sex and that he was torn between his desire to indulge what he thought his boyfriend wanted and his fear of being hurt again. David, the man who had manipulated and broken him, had been his second and very last partner in that matter and it had always felt awful (to say the least). Since then, Fíli had always associated anal penetration to the abuse he had been subjected to. His therapist had listened to him and asked questions about his relationship with Kíli.

 

At the end of their last session, she had pointed out that Kíli wasn’t David, so what was the main issue Fíli was worried about? That day, Fíli had come back to his house with a mind full of questions. And fear.

He was afraid of having fallen fast and hard for a man who could eventually leave and destroy him. Afraid of being too clingy, dependent on Kíli’s affection. Afraid of being alone and hurt. Afraid of eliciting pity, or worst, disgust, because he was broken. Afraid of being left behind if he couldn’t satisfy Kíli’s sexual cravings.

 

All of those catastrophic “what if” scenarios spiralling in Fíli’s mind had made him so nauseous he had spent long minutes dry heaving over the toilet bowl that evening. Later that night, Kíli had called to take him out for drinks, but Fíli had lied about important extra work to do to avoid further questions and stay alone.

 

The two men hadn’t talked about what they both called “the thumb incident” in their heads (without knowing that the other one had done so as well). Fíli felt uncomfortable about it and wanted Kili to do the first step. Unfortunately, the brunette seemed uninterested in doing so.

 

Kíli’s bad dream from last night had revived Fíli’s anxiety, and the blonde was in a constant state of alert. He could sense something was odd; he just couldn’t put his finger on it, but he knew it. Once again, Kíli was elusive and hid behind too bright smiles. As viciously as a predator stalking its prey, anxiety began creeping along Fíli’s spine to settle for good in his head and poison his thoughts.

 

***~~~~***

 

A fresh pot of coffee was brewing when Kíli went down the stairs a few minutes before eleven. His still damp hair was slowly wetting the back of his tank top, and he felt like he was walking through a thick fog. Coffee would do him good.

 

When the Irishman stepped into his living room with a steaming mug in his hand, he spotted Fíli on the sofa.

The blonde was sitting cross-legged, focused on the laptop settled on his lap, the screen’s cold light reflected on his pale and tired face.

A recent visit to an ophthalmologist had confirmed he was farsighted; thus he was now used to wear glasses to read. Kíli couldn’t have resisted and had joked about Fíli growing old, but he was secretly glad because he thought Fíli looked even sexier with his thin horn-rimmed glasses on. This morning was no exception, and Kíli heaved a soft sigh before clearing his throat to get Fíli’s attention.

 

“‘Morning,” Kíli said with a coy smile before flopping onto a chair across from his boyfriend. Fíli closed his laptop and set it aside on the coffee table. To Kíli’s disappointment, he took his glasses off and pinched the bridge of his nose before yawning and stretching out.

 

“How are you feeling?” enquired Fíli with a tired voice.

“I slept a few hours. You?”

“Same.”

 

An awkward silence settled, making Fíli grow restless. Kíli was looking down, avoiding his eyes. The familiar weight of anxiety settled at the bottom of Fíli’s spine increased in intensity, making his whole back tingle. Usually, this sensation announced a panic attack. But not today. Today, Fíli was fed up and angry. His next words cut like a knife in the silent room.

 

“So… When do you plan on telling me?”

 

Kíli’s head snapped up, and he stared at Fíli with huge panicked eyes. “Telling you what?”

 

“When you leave me?”

 

Kíli was in shock, riveted to his chair. “Wh… What? What the hell are you saying?”

 

“Oh, please! Stop beating around the bush and tell me the truth for a change! Do you think I’m that thick? Do you?”

 

Kíli just could shake his head stupidly, his mouth slightly open but unable to utter a sound.

 

“Do you think I don’t see when you fake things, just like this morning? I know you were awake! You just could have said you wanted to sleep in, you know? What else do you hide from me?”

 

Kíli wanted to reply, but he just could stare passively and take hit after hit as Fíli was yelling at him. Fíli, who was now looking at him with a barely contained rage, had his chest heaving, his face flushed and his eyes already red-rimmed as bitter tears were rolling down his cheeks.

 

“For fuck’s sake, say something!”

 

Kíli shook his head and tried to speak. “I… uh…”

 

“Fuck, I knew it!” cried Fíli. “Gimme back my keys! I’m outta here!”

 

The world was revolving in a painful slow motion. Kíli saw Fíli stand up and storm out of the room. Less than a minute later, the front door slammed, making Kíli drop his coffee and startle back to reality.

 

“Fuck…” the Irishman muttered, barely acknowledging the shards of his broken mug as he jumped on his feet to run after Fíli.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not relish angst, but I think this was necessary.
> 
> What do you think about this? I don't know about you, but I need comforting things after this chapter.
> 
> [Thanks to Un_eclair_puis_la_nuit for the quick beta <3 <3 <3]


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili chases after Fili in the street. Something unexpected happens.

“Fíli, wait!”

Unaware of the cold and wet concrete under his bare feet, Kíli ran through the street, barely dodging the wheelie bins and the passers-by who were too slow to move aside.

He wanted to bash himself in the head for being such a jerk, but first, he had to catch up with Fili and make amends. If Fili let him do so, that is.

Fíli heard Kíli shouting his name, but he continued on his way. He even increased his speed, walking in angry strides, not caring about the traffic as he crossed the street. Tires screeched, followed by an aggressive honk and a string of insults. Fíli ignored them. He just wanted to go home and shut himself away.

“Fíli! Stop, for Christ sake! Let me talk to you! ”

“Fuck off, Kili!”

“Please, stop!”

The thought of Fili being angry and unhappy because of him made Kili nauseous. He had to fix this. By all means necessary.

All of a sudden, sharp pain in his left foot took him off guard, and he fell all sprawled out to the pavement with an intense howl.

The thud and loud cry made Filid turn around. Kíli was on the ground, clutching his left foot. It was bleeding.

“Oh, shit,” Fíli whispered, and he rushed to join Kíli, all anger suddenly forgotten. Crouched beside the brunet, Fíli tried to control himself. The sight of blood had always made him sick.

“I walked on a fecking shard of glass,” Kíli hissed. “I think it’s still inside. Feck, it hurts!”

Fíli gulped hard and repressed gagging. “You must see a doctor. Can you get up?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Fíli offered a helping hand, and Kíli took it gladly.

“Let’s go back to your house, all right? Do you have a first aid kit?”

“I think I have a few plasters, but nothing more.”

Fíli arched an eyebrow. “No antibacterial gel?”

“No. I’m sorry.” Kíli winced from pain as tears flooded his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Fíli.”

Fíli shushed him gently. “Let’s take you home.”

 

****

 

Kíli was right: he had no first aid kit. He only half surprised Fíli when he confessed he knew no doctor as well, objecting he needed none because he was never ill.

In the end, Fíli called his own doctor, and the man was kind enough to come and tend to Kíli's foot. Fortunately, the cut wasn’t wide enough to require stitches.

The injured man was now on his bed, propped up against pillows, his injured food protected by a neat bandage.

“I guess I should be on my way,” Fíli mumbled after Dr Evans left.

“I’d rather you stay. If you want to, that is,” objected Kíli as he waited for his boyfriend to stop staring at the floor.

After a few painful seconds, Fíli sighed and dared to raise his head to meet Kíli’s pleading eyes.

“All right. I’ll make some tea.”

Once alone in the kitchen, Fíli broke down in tears. All of this was his damn fault. Because of his ridiculous assumptions, Kíli was injured, and he would never forgive himself.

The more he thought about Kíli’s bleeding foot, the more his body was shaken by spasms and sobs that threatened  to overcome his will to remain discreet.

“You fucking failure!” Fíli growled dully as he slammed the nearest wall with both fists. He had to stifle a groan of pain. He wasn’t used to punching things, but he should have known that a concrete wall would always win a fist fight. Somehow, focusing on the physical pain helped a bit, and after a few moments, Fíli forced himself to sit down and take deep calming breaths.

Once calmed down, he splashed his face with cold water from the tap and wiped it with way too much kitchen roll. He hurried to put the kettle on and gathered the tea bags and the mugs on a tray. There was no way for him to check his face before going back to Kíli’s room, but he knew what he would see anyway: his face reddened by the crying, and ugly puffed up eyes.

 

This had to stop.

Then, a thought emerged in his mind. He had to try. At worst, his plan wouldn’t work, and they could talk about it. At best, both their horizons could be interestingly widened.

Fíli took a great breath and after a deep sigh, he carefully climbed up the narrow stairs leading to the bedroom.

 

****

 

Kíli’s eyes were closed when Fíli entered his room. Fíli balanced the tray on the one hand and shut the door as gently as possible.

“You’re here…” The whisper came from the bed. His voice sounded so fragile it made Fíli wince internally.

“Yeah,” Fíli whispered back, not daring to talk louder than Kíli. “I made some tea.”

“Thanks.”

Fíli put the tray on the floor before taking the mugs and handing one to Kíli.

“May I sit next to you?”

Kíli didn’t answer, but he moved a bit so Fíli could sit down beside him. Both absorbed in their tea, they drank in silence. After a brief moment of calm, the tension between them was back. Neither of them wanted to speak first, and the situation was getting more and more ridiculous each passing second. At length, Fíli sighed.

“I keep screwing up, Kíli…”

Kíli huffed a humourless laugh.

“Well, you’re in good company…”

Another moment of silence passed until Fíli dared to look at Kíli. The latter was fidgety and playing with his cup as he was looking for something to say, but for once he was out of words.

“Kíli?”

The brunet didn’t answer. Fíli gulped hard and gently took the empty mug from his boyfriend’s hands to put it on the nightstand. Kíli let his hands fall into his lap and started picking at a loose thread in his blanket. His eyes were focused on his hands, and his mouth was, for once, inexpressive. Fíli sighed before plucking up the courage to speak.

“Kíli, I apologise. Everything is my fault. I…” Fíli’s voice broke as he began to tear up. “I freaked out. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.”

Fíli’s head snapped up to find Kíli’s troubled hazel gaze fixed on him.

“What?” Fíli sniffled.

“Don’t apologise,” Kíli repeated with a firmer voice. “If someone here is a jerk, then it’s me.”

Fíli started protesting, but Kíli cut him short. Things had to get out.

“I haven’t been myself lately, and I know I made you worry. I hate that I hurt you. I really do love you.”

“And I love you too, but-” 

 

“No please, let me finish.” Kíli paused and took a deep breath before speaking again. “There’s something I want, no, I need to tell you. It’s just that… It’s rather embarrassing, and I don’t know how to say it.”

Kíli, the cheeky and daring man Fili knew, was now hanging his head down like a child being chided after having been caught stealing a cookie from the jar. At this instant, he looked much younger than he was.

“You know you can tell me everything,” Fíli said. “Please. I know something’s wrong. I’ve been feeling it for weeks, and it’s driving me bonkers. I need to know what’s going on.”

Fíli dared to put a gentle hand on Kíli’s thigh, and Kíli covered it with his own, much to the blond’s relief. This simple touch made them both feel a bit more comfortable.

“Ok…” Kíli was looking for words, but nothing seemed to fit. “It’s about… about last time; the last time we… well, you know.” Fíli nodded, encouraging him to go on. “It was a bit special… with the biting, and, well, the other thing…”

“The thumb,” Fíli muttered, blushing a bit as he recalled what had happened.

“Yeah, the thumb… And the way you…  _ dominated _ me.” Kíli was blushing as well now. “I found myself wanting more.”

“Oh dear,” breathed Fíli, his blushing now reaching the tip of his ears. Before thinking of it, the words got out of his mouth “I liked it too.”

“You did?”

Kíli’s incredulous tone added to Fíli’s embarrassment, but this conversation was so much needed that he forced himself to continue. He had a plan in mind after all.

“Yeah… And I don’t know what to think of it.” Fíli paused, looking worried. “Does it make me a pervert?”

Kíli smiled. “Well, if you’re a pervert, then I’m one too.”

Fíli’s face was now the one of a fish out of the water. At length, he smirked and chuckled. “Oh God, what’s happening?”

Kíli chuckled as well and intertwined his fingers with Fíli’s. “Interesting things are happening. And… I’d like them to happen again. If you wish to as well.”

That was the signal Fíli was waiting for. The sensible part of his mind screamed at him to remain cautious. So, he decided to follow his gut.  _ Careful now. Don’t mess this up, _ he told himself.

“I… I don’t know. It’s a lot to take in.”

“Do you feel ashamed? Because you don’t have to. I mean, I was surprised when it happened, but it felt so good, even if it was an accident.” Kíli paused again and breathed deeply through his nose. “If I want to be truly honest with you, the dream I had last night was about that.”

“Was it?” Fíli was now genuinely intrigued. “Care to share?”

Kíli blushed again as he recalled his fantasies. “Do you promise you won’t freak out if I tell you everything?”

“I promise, even if you’re scaring me a little right now.”

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing gross,” Kíli replied gently, though an amused smile was dancing on his lips.

Fíli chuckled nervously. “Define gross?” And then Kíli laughed in earnest. God, how Fíli had missed this.

“No, seriously.” Kíli tried to compose himself to avoid saying something silly. “No, it wasn’t gross at all. On the contrary.” He slightly squeezed Fíli’s fingers, and Fíli squeezed back. “We were in a room, but it wasn’t a bedroom. It felt more like a place inside an old castle or manor, with stone walls and floor. I mean, I could  _ smell _ it. There was a fire going on. I… I recall I was naked and blindfolded, on all fours on furs. And you had cuffed my hands together behind my back.”

Fíli’s breath hitched at the images unfolding in his head. Much to his surprise, it appeared to be incredibly hot.

“You were bare-footed. And you had your camera. I could hear you taking pictures. I couldn’t see you and I remember that it was a massive turn on for me.”

Kíli’s cheeks heated again at the memory of those sensations. The warmth of the fire, Fíli’s bare feet brushing the stone floor, the scent of sweat mingled with the one of leather and Fíli’s sandalwood perfume. Then, he remembered the flogger and a surge of want flared within his chest.

“I remember you caressing my back with a flogger. It was very soft… And I was… madly aroused by it.”

Kíli cast a tentative glance at Fíli, feeling shy and exposed all of a sudden. But the look in Fíli’s eyes was fiery, his pupils slightly more dilated than normal, and it took Kíli’s breath away.

“Go on,” Fíli incited, his voice now lower and rougher than usual.

Kíli cleared his throat. “You were… um… authoritative, but not pushy. Just…  _ dominating _ . And… I loved it. You said I deserved a reward for being an obedient boy. Oh my god…”

Kíli ran his hands through his hair, trying to get a grip on himself. He knew Fíli was watching him and his boyfriend’s look seemed to burn like fire around and through him. His body betrayed his thoughts as it responded to Fíli’s piercing and heated glance, so Kíli put his hands in his lap as to hide his growing erection. A sweet but firm hand pushed his aside and pressed the bulge in his pants, eliciting a soft gasp.

Fíli was enthralled by Kíli’s tale. The more surprising fact was that he was feeling no shame in picturing himself in a position of power, and it was turning him on more than he thought it could do. He shifted on the bed and lay on his side, one hand supporting his head and the other returning to Kíli’s crotch. He wanted to know more, so he asked for it.

“Continue.”

Kíli gulped hard. “You ordered me on my back, and you began massaging my feet, and then further up my legs…”

“Yes.” Fíli purred.

“You spread my legs…”

“Like that?” Fíli asked as he settled gently between Kíli’s knees and moved them apart slowly.

Kíli gasped and let his lover do as he wanted. Thank god he wasn’t standing for he felt his legs slightly shaking with anticipation. It was the first time he was witnessing a certain boldness in Fíli’s behaviour, and he found himself liking it.

“Yeah…”

“And then, what did I do?”

“You… Oh, Jesus… you massaged my perineum.”

“Mmmm,’ Fíli purred. “How did it feel?”

“Good… It felt so good…” Kíli’s breath was coming in soft pants as he recalled what would happen next.

Fíli was now busy sliding Kíli’s sweatpants down and off, and a wolfish grin spread on his face as he saw that Kíli wasn’t wearing any underwear. He slid up on the bed to face Kíli’s stomach and bunched up his t-shirt, just enough to kiss his way along his boyfriend’s hip down to his cock.

“Tell me more.”

“I wasn’t allowed to speak, but I wanted to scream. It was so good… Ohhh fuck…”

“Language.” Fíli’s eyes were full of mischief, and the playful smile displaying his dimples made Kili giddy with want.

He found it hard to speak as Fíli was now licking the tip of his cock, gathering its salty slickness on his tongue, one hand gripping his left hip and the other jerking him off slowly.

Kíli let out a dragged out moan and reached out to tangle the fingers of one hand in Fíli’s hair, the other gripping the pillow supporting his head. The sight of Fíli lapping at the head of his cock while wickedly smiling at him sent another wave of heat through his chest.

“And then, what happened next?” Fíli asked as he squeezed Kíli’s cock slightly harder, making the latter throw his head back and sink into the pillow with a strangled moan.

“You… you lifted my thighs up and bent my legs so you could rim me.”

“Oh…” Fíli breathed just before taking Kíli in his mouth.

Kíli was far gone now. His breath was coming in sharp pants, and he felt heat pulling into the pit of his stomach as Fíli was taking him deeper in the slick warmth of his mouth.

“I wanted… to beg you… to fuck me… Ohhh, Jesus, yes, don’t stop!”

Fíli accelerated his pace, sucking hard until he could feel the tremors in Kíli’s thighs annunciating his impending orgasm. He kept a relentless rhythm and smiled internally as Kíli came hard in his mouth, the acrid taste of his semen tasting like the most delicious treat to him. He swallowed and slowed down to hold Kíli through the aftershocks until the latter pulled out of his mouth with a little jerk due to overstimulation.

“Who are you and what have you done to my boyfriend?” Kíli asked, still battling for breath.

Fíli chuckled as he sat up straight before draping himself all over his lover and kissing the tip of his nose.

“You just put me in the mood for it,” Fíli said, a broad smile on his face. “So… This dream of yours was interesting.”

“Interesting?” Kíli parroted.

“Yes, in many ways.”

Kíli couldn’t believe his ears. It sounded so unreal he felt the urge to pinch himself to prove he wasn’t dreaming.

“We can try out some things and see if we both like it, you know?”

Kíli couldn’t have wished to hear this from his boyfriend’s mouth. Fíli’s past as a sexual abuse victim still concerned him, and he didn’t want to make him uncomfortable or worse, hurt him.

“Are you sure you’re ready?” Kíli asked, deeply uncertain.

Fíli became serious. “Look, I don’t know if I’ll be ever ready, but I want to put the past where it belongs. You’re not David, and I’m dead sure you would never hurt me on purpose. So… “He let his voice trail off and smiled. “I’m willing to experience things with you. Nothing would make me happier.”

Fíli’s genuine smile made Kíli’s heart melt. His boyfriend was definitely on the path to recovery, and Kíli felt like the luckiest man on Earth as he was accompanying him towards success with all the love he could give him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a fill for the WinterFRE2018. Thanks to Lakritwolf for the beta-reading :D
> 
> Join me in the pillow fort and let's have a little chat. I'd love to hear your thoughts :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This is my first foray into kinky territory, so I hope I haven't done any gross mistakes.
> 
> Now, get comfortable and let's have a little chat by the fire. I'd love to hear your thoughts.
> 
> Oh, and 'dearg' means 'red' in Irish ;)


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